UTek: Skyrim: Nine things to do first

How we intend to spend the first three hours

Being asked to write a "where to go" feature about The Elder Scrolls 5: Skyrim on the strength of Penny Arcade Expo revelations and what the internet's pinched out in the meantime. That's like holding up a dictionary to a toddler, flicking through the pages, and telling it to get on with its first novel. The best you'll get out of the tiny idiot is a disarming blank chuckle. Babies are like that. They'll try to charm you, despite being completely rubbish at everything. Anyway, here's my attempt at being a list-based tourist information bureau.

1. Explore Embershard Mine

On the winding path that leads from the Mystical Cave of Character Selection to the peaceful town of Riverwood, comes your first and earliest opportunity to step off the path and have a little explore. Off to the right is Embershard Mine, one of the hundreds* of dungeons scattered across Skyrim. For a basic, common-or-garden dungeon, it seems pretty nicely designed, with a lever-operated bridge, the corpse of a man who kept a really wordy diary, a chest containing a random enchanted weapon, and a number of easily subdued bandits. The dungeon's said to be easy, which should be a relief - my enduring memory of Morrowind is getting my arse lopped off and handed to me by a skeleton, in the very first cave I wandered into.

*There are at least 150 dungeons, Bethesda's Pete Hines has revealed. He hasn't given the actual number, but seems to imply that if we knew it, we would weep with gratitude.

2. Break up some lovers in Riverwood

In Riverwood, Faendal and Sven are both in love with the same girl. Sven is the local Bard, and Faendal is an elven bowman. Faendal hates Sven's light-heartedness, and Sven thinks Faendal is a dick. Whichever you speak to first will give you a lying letter to give to the girl - a letter that's pretending to be from the other one. God knows what it says - probably "hey I'm an idiot and your boobs are smelly see ya" - but you can choose whether to pass on the rude letter, or tell the truth. Come down on Sven's side, and you'll get some coin. Faendal, on the other hand, will offer to follow you around, shooting things. He can also teach you archery skills, for cash.

3. Get that Golden Claw

Every press event we've been to features the same mission - retrieving the stolen Golden Claw, realising it's a key, and using it to get your first power word in the language of the dragons. The surprising thing is, how close that mission is to the beginning of the game. Just walk into Lucan Valerius' general story in Riverwood, and he'll be telling his daughter that she's not to go off on any more adventures, and oh look an adventuring sort, maybe he can help.

Do this mission for him, and you'll notice a lot of the cheaper stuff in his shop is no longer marked with the red "Steal" text. That's because he likes you now, and doesn't mind you manhandling his apples.

4. Fanny about in Barrow Hills

One of the most eye-catching things you see when you come out of your birthing cave is the archways punctuating the mountain on the other side of the valley. This is Bleak Fells Temple, and it's just a short walk through Barrow Hills Bluff. You'll need to go here on your way to fetch the claw from the previous point, but it's worth a look around. Check out the top of the Watchtower for another chest. Rummage around the temple for the first part in a serial of books called Thief.

5. Hunt Dragon Souls

Killing dragons gives you the souls you need to use your new shouting powers. According to Bethesda, the first dragons will appear as you follow the main quest, after which they'll become a little more radiant, appearing at random.

Everyone has a different experience with dragons. One player might see one flapping in the distance. Another could be interrupted in a building by people running in and saying one of the scaly bastards is perched on a nearby house. Or you could not see on at all. Talk about a snub.

6. Visit the walled city of Whiterun

In Whiterun, guards may rebuke you for "lollygagging". Bethesda has yet to confirm whether a "Press X to refute allegations of lollygagging" prompt will appear. There's also an absolute cow of a woman called Saffir. She's not one of the quest-givers, so her chat isn't fully-fledged branching dialogue. She's got a daughter, who is apparently an absolute cow too, and if you bother her enough she'll tell you to leave her alone. Or her husband might appear out of radiant nowhere and tell you he's lost his sword, and could you fetch it from a randomly assigned dungeon, please? It should all add up on some level.

7. Join a Guild

At the top of Whiterun, is a building with a lovely and unpronounceable Viking name. It seems like a drinking hall, and when you walk in, there'll probably be a massive fight going on. It's not an ITV documentary - this is the fighters' guild. The Companions are run by a man called Kodlak Whitemane, he appreciates a bit of modesty, so be sure to emphasise how much you've got to learn, rather than how many dragons you've duffed up.

8. Unwind with some Alchemy

Everything edible item you find in the world has four hidden properties. Have a little nibble on one, and you'll discover one of those properties. You can also find more properties at the alchemy desk, with trial and error at the alchemy benches in local shops. Here's one to get you going: Bone Meal and a Blue Mountain Flower. They both share the property "Fortify Conjuration", so you'll get a magic-boosting potion. Your skill level doesn't affect the success - if you find a match, you'll make a potion. If you can't be bothered learning everything, we're sure a dedicated data-phile will produce an ASCII FAQ within a week of release..

9. Fail to join the Dark Brotherhood

Up on a hillside is a building. The building has a door, and that door is marked with the emblem of the dark brotherhood. The door wouldn't open, but it does ask you a riddle, which is pretty off-beat behaviour for a door. In Oblivion, you joined the Assassin's Guild by killing an innocent and going to sleep. I suspect there's something similar at work in Skyrim. Don't sleep or you might wake up somebody's brother.